HEY! So, this entry may not be the most happiest thing in the world, but it brings awareness to something some like to avoid. My blog entries after this will be filled with much joy and excitement. So stick around. Thanks! 🙃
What’s the key to life?? I honestly couldn’t tell you. I do know that as you grow and make a couple of unwise choices and go through dark phases in your life after a while you start to wonder if there is a specific “key” or for better words a lesson that has to be found or learned. I’m only in my early 20’s but the series of unfortunate events that’s have happened in my life (ha, see what I did there?) have taught me A LOT. After 21 years of enduring the same pain I know now I no longer want to feel it. I won’t go into extreme detail about my life, but I’ve dealt with losing a parent, having to grow and teach myself quite a bit on my own, being bullied, self hate, being broke, and depression along other things.
After all of that time I finally realized that I don’t want to carry that burden on my shoulders any longer. I got tired of feeling sorry for myself. I got tired of watching all of my peers succeed and grow in life while I watched on the side lines with self pity in my heart and mind. It took me getting to the point of attempting suicide to wake up and realize I didn’t want to be this angry and sad person anymore. If I could talk to that sheriff that helped me that day, I would thank him for hours. In a way he saved my life. I’m so grateful. I still have a lot to work on…I’m not completely healed. Overcoming depression doesn’t take just a couple of months, but I’m better. Dealing with all of that had helped me grow. I’m so much better, and I can tell because for so long I’ve been embarrassed to share anything with anyone including people that know me and know of me. Now I see there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. People go through things…I mean we’re human. Some like to pretend or hold it all in. Well I can’t do that…I I have to say what I feel.
I know that there are many battles ahead for me to fight, but I’ll have more confidence and I’ll be ready to fight them. I just hope there’s someone…even if it isn’t a lot of people, but someone out there that sees this and feels encouraged to try and be better. To try and get help or talk to someone. I don’t have too many people to talk to so I understand feeling alone, but you can talk to me. Anyway, I’m working towards being better… I’m finally in college…community college, but college! I’m hoping to transfer to my dream school and be someone big who helps this world and give back to it until I no longer can. I’m working towards being more positive and learning about anything spiritual to help with that. I just want to project happy vibes wherever I am. I haven’t learned everything, but I’ve learned enough to prepare me for what’s ahead.
I guess that what I can say to you is…The key to life is whatever you makes you happy. It’s whatever you want it to be. If it brings you joy then there you have it. The key to life in a way is happiness. It’s finding what brings you happiness and going after it. Anyway, I just wanted to share some part of me with this blog. It’s not everything, but it’s something. Again I’ll say that my blog won’t always be this dark. It’ll be happy and joyful and hilarious because I think I am *flips hair*! Haha! My blog will be filled with pieces of me. So hopefully you’ll stick around after this and see what I’ll bring to this soon to be amazing blog of mine (in my most humble voice). Lol. If you made it this far you’re a trooper and thanks! 👏